So, so, so disappointing.\u00a0 What the hell happened with Christian Bale?\u00a0 He used to be so awesome but then he started talking in a gravelly voice to be Batman and now he won’t let it go.\u00a0 I know he’s a good actor because I’ve seen his other work, but he makes a shitty John Connor.\u00a0 Thomas Dekker pwns him.\u00a0 I mean for serious.\u00a0 All this movie does is make you long for the TV show.\u00a0 Seriously, the Sarah Connor Chrominomicles is SO much better than this pointless movie.\u00a0 It’s really disappointing that the series got cancelled because even though it meandered a lot and did some things I didn’t agree with, it had a kick ass finale that set up what looked to be an amazing third season.\u00a0 That we will never get that third season but instead get the\u00a0schlock that was this movie… *sigh*\u00a0 What a world, what a world.\u00a0<\/p>\n
Terminator: Salvation is very entertaining.\u00a0 Post-apocalyptic futures are always cool and the action sequences, special effects and robots on display here\u00a0are wicked awesome.\u00a0 There were a few sequences that practically had my jaw fall to the floor but apart from that it’s all shit.\u00a0<\/p>\n
Why the fuck is Bryce Dallas Howard in this movie?\u00a0 She’s not a huge star but she’s a big enough name that she deserves better than to be the most useless Kate who ever did Kate.\u00a0 Remember the third Terminator movie?\u00a0 Probably not, because it wasn’t very good.\u00a0 But Claire Danes had a shitload more to do as Kate than BDH does.\u00a0 She is beyond pointless in this movie.\u00a0 I have no idea why she is in it.\u00a0 I guess just for continuity???\u00a0 Everytime she was on screen I just sat there confused.\u00a0 Why does she look like\u00a0a supermodel while everyone else is grungy?\u00a0 I mean it’s a post-apocalyptic future!\u00a0 Where did she find the lipstick and blow dryer!?\u00a0 What the fucking fuck?!?!?!<\/p>\n
There is one other female character in this movie and she was ok.\u00a0 I liked her actually but man, the dudes who wrote this script did so with their thumbs up their asses because while she started out cool she very, very quickly became retarded.\u00a0 God, whatever, it’s not even worth talking about.\u00a0 The only other characters in this movie are interchangeable.\u00a0 There’s John Connor, Marcus Wright and Kyle Reese.\u00a0 It’s cool to see a teenaged Kyle and Marcus was also pretty decent but my issue is that these three dudes are ALL THE SAME!\u00a0 It actually makes sense for Kyle and John to be similar because they are father and son but why is Marcus John 2.0?\u00a0 Marcus is the new terminator.\u00a0 I don’t consider that to be a spoiler because you see it in the trailer so there it is.\u00a0 He’s the new Arnold but all like sensitive and shit but all he did was make me long for Summer Glau.\u00a0 How come they couldn’t make the new terminator different from John Connor?\u00a0 I mean really?\u00a0 He was in fact so eerily similar to John that I kept thinking there was going to be a point to it.\u00a0 I really thought he was going to kill John and take over his identity or something, that’s how identical they were!!!\u00a0 I really wanted Summer Glau or Shirley Manson to come along and be like, listen up dudes, THIS is how you play a terminator!\u00a0 Take some fucking notes!<\/p>\n
I think the third movie proved that you can’t have a Terminator movie without Sarah Connor.\u00a0 She is the essence of this universe, not John.\u00a0 That’s why the show is named after her for god’s sake!\u00a0 They kind of realize that in this movie, so they show her picture and John is seen listening to the tapes she made for him but once again, if you have seen the series, this movie will just make you weep for its cancellation.\u00a0 In the show they give you a sense of why John is the savior of mankind.\u00a0 It’s cryptic but you get the idea that they are leading up to something.\u00a0 In this movie you just sit there wondering why\u00a0Christian Bale is using his Batman voice.\u00a0 Why is\u00a0John so special?\u00a0 Oh, it’s ’cause he’s not!\u00a0 He is not special!\u00a0 He does nothing but talk to peeps over the radio and supposedly inspire them.\u00a0 Whatevs dude, pick up crochet if you need a hobby.<\/p>\n
The more I think about it the less I like this movie.\u00a0 As I said, it was fun to watch.\u00a0 Good action, sweet robots.\u00a0 But dumb script, dump plot, dumb characters.\u00a0 You know what’s weird though?\u00a0 I had a trippy experience seeing this movie because I saw it with someone who liked it.\u00a0 I usually go to see movies with people who have similar views as I do but I saw this one with a friend of a friend who IS the target audience.\u00a0 He is the demographic marketing dudes swoon over.\u00a0 He is a white male aged 18 to whatever and he fucking jizzed all over himself throughout this entire film.\u00a0 I mean he loved it so much I kind of wanted to switch seats because I was so sick of him clapping every two seconds.\u00a0 For reals y’all.\u00a0 It was so surreal.\u00a0 After it was over he went on and on about how awesome it was and I sort of had an epiphany.\u00a0\u00a0So THAT’S why these movies get made.\u00a0 THAT’S why there are never any compelling female or non-white characters (which he didn’t even notice until I pointed it out and even then he couldn’t see why it was a problem!!!!!).\u00a0 THAT’S why 90% of the movie is about shit getting blown up.\u00a0 THAT’S why the love story is so cheesy and underwritten.\u00a0 THAT’S why the ending made me roll my eyes from the sheer corniness and non-sensicalness.\u00a0 Because of dudes like him.\u00a0 God, life sucks.\u00a0<\/p>\n
In all sincerity I apologize for being so insulting towards this guy.\u00a0 He doesn’t know me and he hasn’t earned the abuse those who know me have learned to expect.\u00a0 He was a nice guy and he has every right to live his life\u00a0enjoying drek like this.\u00a0 But his enjoyment of the movie just makes me depressed because it means they’re gonna greenlight the fucking sequel.<\/p>\n
I’m still giving this shit 3 niqueheads because the robot design, seriously?\u00a0 The non-humanoid ones?\u00a0 Fucking kick-ass.\u00a0 And even though I complained about them blowing shit up, the action sequences were rad.\u00a0 At one point they actually try to blow something up and fail and it made my heart sing.\u00a0 It was one tiny pebble of realism in a sea of retardation.\u00a0 And in the summer of\u00a0suck a pebble will get you a niquehead.\u00a0 [rating:30]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
So, so, so disappointing.\u00a0 What the hell happened with Christian Bale?\u00a0 He used to be so awesome but then he started talking in a gravelly voice to be Batman and now he won’t let it go.\u00a0 I know he’s a good actor because I’ve seen his other work, but he makes a shitty John Connor.\u00a0 […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[11,10,39,17],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.niqueworks.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1225"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.niqueworks.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.niqueworks.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.niqueworks.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.niqueworks.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1225"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"http:\/\/www.niqueworks.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1225\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1229,"href":"http:\/\/www.niqueworks.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1225\/revisions\/1229"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.niqueworks.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1225"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.niqueworks.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1225"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.niqueworks.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1225"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}